Well, I figured it out. In case anyone was wondering the same thing - do this:
Right click "Global Actions" and hit "New Command"
There are instructions on how to simulate any key pressing, and in my case, I did [F8_Down][F8_up].
Name your "new action" and assign it a keystroke, and you're all set. I'd like to thank boredom for allowing me to sit here and figure it out - my lazyness also thanks you (me).
~Matt